A Doc's Life is a underground Medical Blog about some poor Singapore doctors. They are sibei sian and very buay song. Best practices not observed!
(Warning: Grammar is non existent in this blog. Those obsessively compulsive about good English please go no further and book an appointment to see your psychiatrist in Singapore.)

Friday, December 11, 2015

Jiak Kin Jio

When you are a Dr, people expect you to know everything!

Whether traditional medicine is good for them. 

Er, wait ar, Dr Og go call my mother first and ask.

Whether going to work will aggravate their BP... 

ok la, ok la take MC la.

Whether the medicine can take with supplements. 

Wah lau, why you don't ask the G@C salesman who sold you your protein shake whether can take medicine or not?

Whether your son's girlfriend is good for him. 

Ok, aunty I saw your family for a long time now but don't drag me into your family politics leh. Plus, must maintain patient confidentiality and cannot tell your son all the naughty things his girlfriend (whom happen to also see moi the friendly neighbourhood dr) done before right? But thumbs up for the good intuition!

But lately... and strangely... people have been asking me about bananas.

Patient: Lokun, I heard bananas can treat my condition!
Dr Og: Is it? You read from internet is it?
Patient: Wah, you lokun, you don't know ar... I thought lokun should know everything! But its possible right? Banana can cure me.
Dr Og: Er, the only case of banana I have encountered was when this guy thought it was funny to shaft a banana down the wrong end of his digestive tract, hahahha...
Patient looking disturbed. 
Dr Og: Ok, I digress but look here, I really don't know if banana is good for your condition. If you like, eat lor. But please also eat your meds ok?
Patient leaves looking disappointed.

The reality is that a doctor doesn't know everything. We only know what science can tell us. Most of the time the science tells us "maybe" or "it depends (on so many factors that there is no way you can understand what I am about to explain so lets not waste each other's time)". Anyway, before I forget, better take a note to check bloods for this patient next visit, in case he takes banana qds and end up with hyperkalemia!


Friday, November 13, 2015

Grand Wayang Round

Nowadays be senior Dr is sibei pai miah (bad life). Last time Consultant in Hospital is like rock star. Can ya ya walk in front during ward rounds and got a whole entourage behind you. Got medical students, got medical officers, nurses (and maybe seventh month got others following, but that one another story). Wah sibei shiok ar. You know the surgeon is sibei humsup if you see the entourage is mostly pretty medical students, pretty MO and pretty nurses. You know the Consultant is gay if you see the entourage is... hee hee hee...

Source: http://lackcolor.com/pic-806-Lots-of-doctors

Of course these days things have changed. Nowadays, there are many many female Consultants as well. To be fair (and avoid kennah feministic attacks), female doctors are just as good as any male doctors. Their pet peeve is kennah called Missy by the ah pek whose memory remains in the 动荡的时代, pre independence Singapore. Hello uncle, now is SG50 Liao, char bor are no longer all nurses la. And matah don't wear Bermudas anymore lor.

I digress.....

In those days when "Consultant is King", you can imagine the kind of power the Head of Department wielded. He is literally the Godfather, with people worshipping the ground he walks on. Godfather will of course have a bigger ego than his Consultants and his entourage will of course be even more solid! When Godfather does ward round, it is not just a ward round, but the Godfather Ward Round, GWR. And because cannot be so obvious in public service, we usually call it Grand Ward Round. But what so grand? The Godfather of course.

GWR is a very important event. In the old days, it can be make of break. It is the time when Consultants become minions and melt into the background as part of the entourage. It is the time you impress the Godfather with your short skirt (why do you think now so many female consultants har?). It is also the time you try to siam being asked questions and being publicly humiliated by the Man himself. Most importantly, it is time when the patients gets the same orders and treatment but will somehow miraculously do better because those same orders came from the mouth of the Man (or they get discharged or transferred to some lesser teams if they don't get better).

I always feel that the big entourage probably did something for the patients.

"Wah! Tua Lo Kun Lai Liao!" They probably thought. Think of how powerful and therapeutic that scene must be! A whole army of doctors and nurses lead by the most senior and most capable doctor coming to see you in the bed and actually poking his finger into that orifice that is causing you problems. Everything also ho sei liao ar!

So wayang or otherwise, once a while Dr Og reminisces about the old times when GWR was done the traditional way. Nowadays, mostly you see lonely consultants rounding. At times, you catch them crying at one corner, lamenting how they kennah whack as junior Drs and now their turn to whack, there is no one around. I think we should bring back the good ol' times as I'm sure patients benefited from megalomanic Consultants and HODs and Dr Og always think of patients first :)

Monday, November 02, 2015

The Reason Why the Haze Has Ended.

So the haze came back. They say the last time the haze was this bad was in 1997. Sure or not? Dr Og remember 1997, I was still a student. Remember was walking with a girl down the quiet road hazy hazy, machiam very romantic. Like in movie like that. Fast forward to today, no more quiet roads around liao and the haze like got a yellow tinge to it.

And as usual, Dr Og didn't get an air purifier in time when the haze struck. I spent many weekends searching online and offline but everywhere sold out liao! In some online electronic stores, even the category mysteriously disappear. Reminds me on how suddenly before midnight or at rush hours, all the taxi sure pang kee one!

So for the whole duration of the haze, my wife and poor kids have to survive on a single air purifier with a three year old filter. They are of course not very HEPA about it (pun intended hahaha). I was reluctant to clean the filter since that would mean me being hantam not only by the PM2.5 for this year's haze but also those that were collected two years ago when the haze was also bad!

I was trying to convince them that they can wear the N95 masks indoors. There are now huge stocks of N95s around so no scared don't have. Some even got air blowing one, so high tech! The kids of course complain that it is uncomfortable and don't want to wear. Hello! Lim peh assisted hours and hours of surgery in N95 plus PPE (personal protective equipment) also never complain. Remember that time, finish surgery, the scrubs so wet, can see the nipple shape liao!

Anyway, I still try my best to find air purifiers and finally found a few units in a store with real HEPA (and not the bluff HEPA type) filters. The air purifiers like more expansive than usual leh but never mind la... Wife and kids happy most important right?

And then hor, the very next day...

No haze liao.......

Singaporeans, you owe me one.


Friday, August 14, 2015

Elitism

Recently read a lot of news about elitism. Then people started kpkb on equality and equity like this boy call Russell. Wah Lau, sibei complicated la. Dr Og England buay sai one, cannot understand simi lai eh?

Actually Dr Og also sibei dulan some of these elite schools students sometimes. I have come across some really hao lian ya ya papaya students from RI / RGS. Talk very big like they know a lot about medicine also. Hello! Lim pek went to elite school when your mother haven't even ovulated you. You better show some respect ar like in those Taiwan shows call us 前辈!(Please don't call uncle hor. I not that old, thank you.)

Anyway, you go good school doesn't mean you elite liao. I check dictionary and dictionary say elite means:

"select group that is superior in terms of ability or qualities to the rest of a group or society."


So you can elite in values, elite in sports, elite in talking cock (like Dr Og, now put your hands down!), etc etc. If you are just elite in PSLE score, please go achieve something in real life before you come show pattern.


A good example of elite is the commandos. Every year they get best unit in army. But they also train the hardest and when war comes, they probably sacrifice first also. Plus many special force people will never reveal their identity and never get the glory they deserve.

This young boy, Russell, also sacrifice. He jit tao kamikaze. Shows his EQ sibei not elite. And Russell, if you go NS that time, complain here pain there pain go see lokun, you better show some respect and remember to call the lokuns 前辈!




Friday, May 15, 2015

Why You Don't Want to Be Happy with Your Doctor

Those of us who work in Hospital will know about the all important Patient Satisfaction Survey (PSS) season. This is when the admin staff suddenly appear from their dungeons and start distributing milo drinks and so-ta-piah (soda crackers) to patients. Dr Og always see some of the doctors steal the milo drinks and biscuits. Wah lau, don't so siah suay can or not... patients only get this type of good service once a year, so don't go and steal la.

But hor, this journal from JAMA which has been circulating around facebook for a while liao shows that higher patient satisfaction was associated with less emergency department use but with greater inpatient use, higher overall health care and prescription drug expenditures, and increased mortality.

What this means is: the more you like your doctor, the clinic or the hospital, the worse your outcome will be!!

Dr Og thinks this may not be true everywhere but sometimes, making the patients satisfied means giving them what they want. And one thing that patient always want is to go off medications. If I tell all my patients meng jiak yok liao (no need medications), I'm sure all of them will be sibei happy lor.

And they probably won't be well enough to make it for the next PSS to register their dissatisfaction.

Actually, what Dr Og thinks really will work is if we survey Doctor's Satisfaction! Surely if your doctor is happy, he will be in a better state to treat you and your outcome will likely improve. JAMA should really look into it! Unfortunately, I can't suggest this to hospital management as I have vested interest.

But if they really do the Doctors Satisfaction Survey hor, then at least we don't have to steal Milo and so-ta-piah (which incidentally is my fave snack)!

ha..ha..