4ever Young

When I was a Houseman, I often see the fear in the eyes of the patients I treated.

The nice patient would say: Lokun you look so young... (then shiver)
The nasty one would say: Lokun you real one or not, now they let teenagers into med school meh???

Ok, the truth is I DO look young but I feel that looking young is better than being mistakened for your balding Professor. Tio boh?

A word of advice for patients, don't make your doctor kan cheong la. Wait he aim buay zhun, who suffer you tell me?

It has been ten years down the road and with the receding hairline, the complaints have been less. But recently I got one from a female patient.

Pt: Dr Og, you had a hair cut. You look much younger than the previous times I saw you...
Dr Og: Real or not?
Pt: Seems like you are younger than me right, I thought you are older...
Dr Og: Isit? Lemme see your ic number starts with what. yah... I abit younger la.
Pt: Like that I cannot see you anymore!

I can understand if someone goes to a nightclub and insist on someone younger. But I'm your doctor can? You think matchmake isit????

And I don't get tips ok!

Solid song from a forgotten era!

The Seventh Month

Someone asked me why I have not been blogging.


Simple truth is that sometimes when I blog, I feel like I'm writing to myself, or worse, to ghosts.... since there is hardly any response from whoever is reading (if any).....


But since its the hungry ghost month, its highly appropriate for me to at least make an entry for the ghosts out there supporting this blog. (My mother will surely scream choy! and hit me in the head if she saw this)

Source: http://asiaparanormal.blogspot.com/

For the Chinese at least, the seventh month can be a rather scary time. We were brought up to believe that the hungry ghosts will do us harm and going out late at night and activities such as swimming were frowned upon during this month. The seventh month this year has been somewhat unsual in that we celebrated NDP in a big way in Marina and will be having the presidential election soon! The pompous fireworks and wong hei (王气) will surely send all the ghosts into hiding!


But that is not true for our hospitals! There remain many scary and unnatural things that we have to look out for! 


The Ghost Whisperer


Technically not scary but suspected to be a spirit medium / tang-ki (乩童) of sorts who serves to bridge the living to the dead. He is usually a junior doctor who appears to be very busy and would disappear for a long time but not get anything done at all. When confronted he would insist that he has done a lot of work although not witnessed by any living patients. It is likely that he has an inert ability to see things that other normal house officers and medical officers cannot and was busy helping those poor souls still lingering the corridors of our wards. His disappearance can be explained by the fact that he transists between earth and the netherworld without really knowing. In actual fact, his colleagues all hope that he will go to hell too!

The real Ghost Whisperer looks nothing like this la!

The Lift

Frightful stuff inside!

Otherwise known as The Elevator. Super slow and often contains scary objects! The Lift in the hospital has a mind of its own having been possessed by the spirit of a nasty ward nursing manager who met an untimely death when the ECG leads, stationeries and paper she was hoarding fell onto her one day. True to her (mean) spirit, you will wait long long if you needed a ride to go to the upper levels. Worse, if you are really down on your luck, The Lift will  bring you down to Level -18 instead where you WILL bump into your CEO!!


The Zombies


Another breed of doctors. Unlike the Ghost Whisperer, the Zombies are doctors who specialises in KLKK (Kia Lai Kia Kee) and have no specific directions (be it in life or in their medical career). They are seen wandering and bumping into one another, often getting in the way of those doing real work. Occasionally, by brownian, these Undead Walkers will wander into the canteen and start having a nice cup of coffee while their fellow doctors continue to slough to their deaths in the ward. The Zombies can be identified by their lack of expression and of eye contact. (Compare this again to the Ghost Whisperer who is often anxious and frightened having seen things they shouldn't...) The Zombies come to work in crumpled clothes having have no motivation whatsoever! 

Blood stains from yesterday's surgery

The Gwai Lo (鬼佬)


Literally "ghost man" in Cantonese, these ghosts are often foreign and used to be mostly pale white when spotted in the past. Recently, black coloured ones have also appeared and have become so prevalent that you are more likely to bump into one of these than an actual Singaporean human! It is also pertinent to note that one must avoid them at all costs this seventh month as it is also Jay-See-I (pronounced J-C-I) haunting month. They may well be one of the auditors from Gwai Lo Land and it will be a straight road to hell if you kennah caught by them!