Grand Wayang Round

Nowadays be senior Dr is sibei pai miah (bad life). Last time Consultant in Hospital is like rock star. Can ya ya walk in front during ward rounds and got a whole entourage behind you. Got medical students, got medical officers, nurses (and maybe seventh month got others following, but that one another story). Wah sibei shiok ar. You know the surgeon is sibei humsup if you see the entourage is mostly pretty medical students, pretty MO and pretty nurses. You know the Consultant is gay if you see the entourage is... hee hee hee...

Source: http://lackcolor.com/pic-806-Lots-of-doctors

Of course these days things have changed. Nowadays, there are many many female Consultants as well. To be fair (and avoid kennah feministic attacks), female doctors are just as good as any male doctors. Their pet peeve is kennah called Missy by the ah pek whose memory remains in the 动荡的时代, pre independence Singapore. Hello uncle, now is SG50 Liao, char bor are no longer all nurses la. And matah don't wear Bermudas anymore lor.

I digress.....

In those days when "Consultant is King", you can imagine the kind of power the Head of Department wielded. He is literally the Godfather, with people worshipping the ground he walks on. Godfather will of course have a bigger ego than his Consultants and his entourage will of course be even more solid! When Godfather does ward round, it is not just a ward round, but the Godfather Ward Round, GWR. And because cannot be so obvious in public service, we usually call it Grand Ward Round. But what so grand? The Godfather of course.

GWR is a very important event. In the old days, it can be make of break. It is the time when Consultants become minions and melt into the background as part of the entourage. It is the time you impress the Godfather with your short skirt (why do you think now so many female consultants har?). It is also the time you try to siam being asked questions and being publicly humiliated by the Man himself. Most importantly, it is time when the patients gets the same orders and treatment but will somehow miraculously do better because those same orders came from the mouth of the Man (or they get discharged or transferred to some lesser teams if they don't get better).

I always feel that the big entourage probably did something for the patients.

"Wah! Tua Lo Kun Lai Liao!" They probably thought. Think of how powerful and therapeutic that scene must be! A whole army of doctors and nurses lead by the most senior and most capable doctor coming to see you in the bed and actually poking his finger into that orifice that is causing you problems. Everything also ho sei liao ar!

So wayang or otherwise, once a while Dr Og reminisces about the old times when GWR was done the traditional way. Nowadays, mostly you see lonely consultants rounding. At times, you catch them crying at one corner, lamenting how they kennah whack as junior Drs and now their turn to whack, there is no one around. I think we should bring back the good ol' times as I'm sure patients benefited from megalomanic Consultants and HODs and Dr Og always think of patients first :)