Mai Jiak Yok!

Lokun: Uncle you drink alcohol?

Ah Pek: Ya, I lim jiu with my kah kee at the kopi tiam every night. Song song drink until midnight den go home. You know la, dun wan hear the wife nag nag nag.

Lokun: Smoking?

Ah Pek: Wah I smoke more than 30 years. You dun ask me quit ok. They say too old quit smoking can die one! Now hun kee very ex, I only smoke one pack a day niah.

After completing the rest of the clerking...

Lokun: Uncle, looks like your condition like that need to take medicine. This one you take one tablet twice a day.

Ah Pek: Wah... like that ar... Mai jiak yok er sai boh (Don't take medicine can or not?). You know western medicine got a lot of side effects. You see the bottle here write POISON! Jiak liao sure tiok tiao! Will dependant cannot come off.

Lokun: No la. This medicine ok one. Anyway your condition needs it.

Ah Pek: Mai la mai la. Medicine no good one. Got anything natural or not??

It often fascinates Dr Og how patients are so paranoid towards "Western medicines". It is of course true that medications have side effects (sometimes severe) and drug companies have in the past attempted to play down on the side effects. But it really irks me when people who smoke and drink tell me they are afraid of taking medications (for fear of dependency and ill effects). Seriously? With all that addictive poison that you are already putting into yourself?

Now, if they stop smoking and drinking, they may actually not need the medications. 

An Interview with the...

Dr Og continues with his investigative journalism this week.

He tried to interview several big shot administrators on but they all siam like Dr Og tiok coronavirus. But  don't worry la, Dr Og never go Middle East recently. Admin people don't so scared leh.

Finally, one person agree to talk to Dr Og.

Let me introduce Ah Tiong, The Security Uncle.

Dr Og: Uncle, how long  have you worked in this hospital?

Uncle: Ten years liao lah. (blow smoke out of mouth)

Dr Og: Wow! Thats a long time!

Uncle: Si lor, lao liao. 

Dr Og: So what are your main duties?

Uncle: I security guard lah, just go jalan here jalan there lor.

Dr Og: You mean you patrol the area. What else do you do?

Uncle: Ar. This one important. We catch doctors.

Dr Og: You mean you catch doctors?!!! What do they do? You mean those doctors piak piak in their office with reps kind? (wink wink)

Uncle: You know la, lokuns like to park car any old how. See those lots in front? Only patient can park la. So if the lokun park, I catch them! And sometime also issue summons. Hahahahaha.

Dr Og: But uncle, but don't you think its a waste of your time to be "catching"doctors? What if they are rushing to see patients and cannot find carpark.

Uncle: That's not lim pek problem ok. CEO say I stand here catch doctor, I catch doctor. (Uncle buay song liao!)

Dr Og: But uncle this hospital just build leh, you don't think very stupid they never project properly and never build enough carpark meh? Also, if the doctor not there yet, patients also can't be seen. Can sometimes pang chance boh?

Uncle: You si ginah. What projection? Don't tell me all the cheem stuff. You not happy go see the CEO or COO or CFO or dunno what O. I going to get my ten year service award and best (catch doctor) service award at Dinner and Dance next week liao. I need the NTUC vouchers from the awards to buy hoon kee (cigarettes) can!??!?! Oh yah, I dressing up as policeman in D and D. You leh?

IT sibei Ho!

Recently my friend who was in charge of the IT implementation of his department told me that the new electronic medical record system is sibei solid.

Well, Dr Og suay suay kennah do IT systems in hospital many years. All I can say is that my youth was wasted (sob sob...) and the time spent evaluating IT systems for the hospital could have been better spent surfing the net for boh liao things (at least that would have brought me some joy tio boh?).

Anyway, since we good friends, I entertain him and ask him why so solid leh?

"You know ar, this time the system hospital want to buy is very customisable. Last time all the systems have to input this input that but this one no need! Means ar the old old lokuns who only want to write a few words in the electronic notes can be easily done. So the lao lokun can just type 'NAD' for notes can liao wor!"

Apparently, this current system costs a few million bucks unlike the cheap cheap ones we evaluated in the past. Understandably, it is more time consuming to be typing notes rather than writing them on paper when seeing patients.

Hmmmm, but to pay few millions so that we can over ride the system to type less...

Hmmmm, nothing that can't be done with simple paper and pen...

IT sibei ho ar!

I rest my case.

Never Learn

Some nice reader left a comment that I must be busy as I have not been blogging recently. To be honest Dr Og had been quite boh eng... this game called Candy Crush has been really sucking up all my time.
Since I kennah stuck at some stupid stage now, I thought take a break.

In between games, Dr Og somemore got to go queue up at MacDonalds... at first for Hello Kitty then the Minions. Really sibei boh eng ar...

The worst thing was when queueing up for Hello Kitty some more got haze! It was really terrible queueing up in the N95 mask and having flashbacks of SARs days.

So while I queue here and queue there, a good friend who works in hospital admin called me.

"Eh brother, you got N95 masks or not?"He ask me.

"Yah la, still got some."Dr Og is a hoarder and I still have those 10 year old N95 masks from SARS days.

"Ooi, don't mind pass me some can?"He pleaded.

"But I thought you work in public hospital, how come no mask ar?" I was puzzled.

"Yah la, the hospital short and now cannot sell to staff...." He replied angrily.

"Wah liao!"

In the end I gave away all my N95s and had to use my recycled nuar nuar (rotten) one.

So it seems, always like that loh. Masks no enough, don't take care of own people and panic only when things happen.... what is new.

Remembering SARS - Part II

We know that ward sisters like to hoard stuff. Can be pens, rulers, toilet papers, swabs and a variety of other daily supplies. I had always conveniently attributed this to our frugal ways since Singapore was a third world country not too long ago. Though of course when you need something in the ward it can be really frustrating. One example was disposable ECG leads. We were always made to reuse ECG leads sometimes to the extent that it is full of (many) patients' (many) hair and was no longer sticky. If you have the experience of holding on to loose ECG leads with your fingers and trying to use your leg to press the start button on the ECG machine, you will know how frustrating and humanly impossible that can be.

Inconvenience is one thing that I can accept. Potentially dying is not. 

When SARS first struck, some ward sisters decided it would be a good idea to hoard the N95 masks. With the virus full blown in Singapore by April and fatality climbing, the possibility of getting infected and dying became real! It was like a movie playing around us, somewhat surreal. Perhaps for some in the hospital, they continued to be in denial.

Being the lowest lifeform in the hospital then as a houseman, we were bounced around each day when we try to get our daily stock of N95 masks. We were told by the ward to get it from the OT but the OT told us that the supply there is only for surgeons operating. When we asked the ward, we were told by the ward sister that there was no stock.

"Zero, no more stock." She told us affirmatively.

We retreated to the MO Room to how our usual kpkb support group sessions.

"Er, I saw the sister carry so many boxes into the nurse manager room leh! How can be no stock ar!!???" One friend cried foul as everyone started complaining loudly.

"Wait ar....." Another fellow houseman stood up and shouted before exiting the room and crouching slowly towards the nursing manager's room.

He disappeared out of sight for a few minutes and returned to the MO room with one box of N95 masks. Enough to last us for a couple of days.

"Wah you went to sister's room and kapok ar?" I exclaimed.

"Well, you can't steal that which does not exist in the first place." He told me with a wink.

RESPECT...

In the next few days, N95 masks became readily available with the hospital's official decree. 

SARS despite being all bad did improve infectious control in the wards. I'm sure ward sisters won't hoard disposable ECG leads anymore these days. Even if its not unhygienic, reusing leads with hair-stuck-on, seriously gross la.