Holy Smoking!

"limpek happy, what can you do about it?"




Smoking is a big health issue. In fact, it costs our small beautiful island millions of peanuts (our national currency) to treat the many ills that befall smokers. At a time when doctors were better respected, this was what we did:

Ah Pek: Lokun, cannot breath properly, sibei jialat..... (coughs)
Loctor: See lah, you smoke so much now your lungs spoil liao loh. Whats that in your pocket? Wah lau, cigarettes!!! you still smoking??? I confiscate first.
Ah Pek: Cannot lah lokun...... I so old already, don't smoke will die!
Loctor: Rubbish, you discharge then give yo back.
Ah Pek: .....

Trust me, the ah pek didn't die from NOT smoking. But tactics like these don't work nowadays when even mah laus have their rights and complain letters come flying in faster than the defunct Concord planes.

There are also those who just cannot come clean with their addiction to hun kee.Loctor: Uncle, looks like you have lung problem. Got smoke or not?
Ah Pek: Aiyah, I quit already lah. Cannot be the cigarettes.
Loctor: Isit? When you quit leh?
Ah Pek: Yesterday loh. But actually not successful. I just had one this morning. Hehe....

Sigh. Incorrigible.

And as much as the medical faternity pretends otherwise, many loctors are also smokers. Most will tell you that they are in various stages of quitting.
"Og, this is my last one!"
"Og, this is really my last one!"
"Og, this time believe me, my very very last one!"
I can really empathise with them as the post two posts ago was my "last post" but the addiction obviously got the better of me....

Of course, smoking is discouraged within hospital compounds and often it becomes a covert operation for lokuns to go for a smoking break.

Og: Wei, where you disappear after lunch?
Loctor friend: Shhsshh! I go find yellow box lah.
Og: At the staircase isit? I always see a lot of cigarettes thrown there!
Loctor friend: No lah. There alot of patients.
Og: Why? You scared they borrow your expensive lighter isit?
Loctor: No lah, they keep asking me for cigarettes. Now very ex ok!
Og: So where you go huh?
Loctor friend: Secret, cannot tell you!

After all, what the monkeys see, the monkeys will do and we really don't want them to model after these bad examples!

Oh well, what the heck, time to go home after a hard day of work preaching to these smokers. Wah! How come got so much smoke coming from behind my car! Catch fire isit??? I ran to the carpark and saw my loctor friend with his kahkis squatting behind my car with cigarettes in their hands.

Og: Wah lau you all damn pathetic leh! I thought you say you going to quit??
Loctor friend: Basket Og, this my last one lah! You really got no sympathy ok!
Sigh. Incorrigible.

Dedicated to the Cigarette Smoking Man