Doctor Superstar

If they can do it, so can we!




With the increasing bad publicity on doctors and hospitals these days, it is about time the faternity do something about its own image.

A good way I think will be to hold a reality idol contest, not unlike Singapore Idol or Project Superstar. Sorry hor, but this contest will not be extended to senior drs who are in their own rights idols already (yes, we worship them in the hospitals!!). We are going for an image revamp and receding hairline just does not fit the bill. Dentist, PhD holders, sinsehs and Steven Lim will of course be excluded as well.

The Arena
Where then should we hold the inaugural season of Doctor Superstar? My suggestion will be TTSH. After all it is always full (crowd garaunteed!) and the A and E waiting time is one of the longest (free entertainment for qeueing patients!). We can just relocate those left over wooden stages from the seventh month getai for a quick fix!
The finals will of course be held in the indoor stadium where the final two super doctors must perform appendicectomy on each other while singing the theme song! Cut throat stuff!!

The Looks
To be an idol these docs must score in the looks department. But heh, our recent top three idols comprised of a crater face pizza delivery boy, an Ah Beng wannabe and a Miss Piggy look alike. So no worries man! We have at least one doctor who made it to Cleo top 3 most eligible bachelor and at least one doctor who joined star search (but din make it to anything other than embarrassment). We will parade them in hospital scrubs, full OT gown and not forgetting our infectious control PAPR suit!

The ContestWith whole myriad of disciplines, it will be unfair to test our idols just on a particular field like X ray reading or surgical skills. Instead, we will stick to singing. We want to engage the public, make them feel that we are also heartlanders! We will sing hokkien gua! Lai ah lai ah, loctor chui gua, long zhong lai tia!

The ControvesyThere will be no lack of controvesy given that almost all doctors are visually impaired (when they take off their glasses). They are also emotionally handicapped like most patients and their family will tell you. Sleeping with judges to rig the contest can be staged with the camera crew secretly filming their left over underwears in the on call room!

The Judges
We will as usual need one bad guy, one good guy and an over the hill female singer. Since the singing is just for show, we might just go for an over the hill Mediacorp actress who had at one time been singing but is now busier with selling slimming products and baby milk powder. Dr Og will volunteer to be...... the good guy of course lah! I will invite that lady who made the bogus complain on the forum (see this) as our resident evil judge seeing that she had the ability to criticise doctors on national paper for no reason at all!

Come to think of it, staging such an event will be a logistic nightmare. Maybe it will be easier to just dump 10 doctors in Sister Island with some angry patients and families! The Survivor wins!!